Okay! It's time for the NHL playoffs to sta...What? They already started? Yesterday?
Oh...well shit.
Well alright, so all of us here at 3 Dusters have a one game head start, but none of us will the make the right predictions anyway, so it doesn't really matter.
Here we go...Oh yeah, and Goody wasn't in the office tonight, so he'll have to add his later. Jesus, we're not off to a good start here. (We're probably all too pumped about the Jays!)
Teebs:
Bruins over Canadiens in 5
Devils over Hurricanes in 7
Capitals over Rangers in 7
Penguins over Flyers in 6
Sharks over Ducks in 5
Red Wings over Blue Jackets in 6
Canucks over Blues in 6
Blackhawks over Flames in 7
Nabber:
Bruins over Canadiens in 6
Devils over Hurricanes in 5
Rangers over Capitals in 7
Penguins over Flyers in 5
Sharks over Ducks in 6
Blue Jackets over Red Wings in 7
Canucks over Blues in 6
Blackhawks over Flames in 6
Goody:
Bruins over Canadiens in 4
Hurricanes over Devils in 6
Capitals over Rangers in 6
Penguins over Flyers in 5
Ducks over Sharks in 7
Red Wings over Blue Jackets in 5
Canucks over Blues in 5
Blackhawks over Flames in 6
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Mid-April Blue Jays Report
7-3
First Place in AL East
I was going to wait until the end of the month to weigh in on how the Jays’ season was shaping up but after this evening’s 12-2 dusting of the Twins I just can’t hold it back any longer. 1st place baby! What a fucking squad they are right now! Their hitting ranks as the best in the league with Lind, Hill and Snider leading the way and the pitching staff is holding down the fort with a couple great outings from rookie Ricky Romero (say that 5 times fast) and the usual dominance from Roy Halladay. The American League’s best bullpen from 08 remains strong, although BJ has looked shaky early.
I must admit that before the season began I predicted this team would win about 75-80 games and finish either 4th or last in the ridiculously strong AL East division. However, after 10 games of shitting all over whomever the opposition decides to toss on the hill, I’m slowly starting to believe that maybe, just maybe, they can compete for a playoff spot in September. Of course, the hitting will probably slide back to being average, and the rotation, which has nearly zero big league experience outside of Doc and Litsch, is not likely to continue to be as good as it has been thus far.
Let’s hope that this start isn’t just a big tease and Cito and the gang are actually legit.
Monday, April 13, 2009
YouTube's Finest
Youtube seems to be the newest craze today, all the young kids are talking about it and countless idiots are getting their 15 minutes of fame by pretending to battle Darth Vader or singing a song about chocolate rain. These videos have garnered international attention, receiving millions of hits across the globe, however, there are some videos out there on youtube that don't get the respect they deserve. I am talking about the next 5 videos, which are not nearly as famous as the ones above, yet are made with such dynamic style and grace that you usually only see in a Scorcese film. These videos capture the essence of brilliance, with acting on par with the likes of Pacino, Crowe or Day-Lewis. Sit back and enjoy the next few minutes of your life.
5. Husky vs. Tony Hawk
The 5th video on this list stars world famous skateboarder Tony Hawk and a Husky, which reminds me, did you hear the story about the skinny guy who went on vacation to Alaska? he came back a husky fucker...Bazing!
4. Slapshot II
This next video is an early cut from the movie Slapshot II. I don't understand how it got left on the cutting room floor?
3. Mini Stick Crosby
This video has it all, great music, good puck movement between goalie and player, and the highly underrated double fall goal celebration.
2. Steve Nash dunking over Kobe.
No Idea.
1. reinactment of ALEXANDER OVECHKIN
Now this is the ultimate fan video. We have what appears to be a girl in a hockey mask with a full shield trying to re-enact Alexander Ovechkins famous goal. Watch both videos and try and tell me which one is real, I dare ya! (The spelling of "reinactment" is the icing on the cake)
5. Husky vs. Tony Hawk
The 5th video on this list stars world famous skateboarder Tony Hawk and a Husky, which reminds me, did you hear the story about the skinny guy who went on vacation to Alaska? he came back a husky fucker...Bazing!
4. Slapshot II
This next video is an early cut from the movie Slapshot II. I don't understand how it got left on the cutting room floor?
3. Mini Stick Crosby
This video has it all, great music, good puck movement between goalie and player, and the highly underrated double fall goal celebration.
2. Steve Nash dunking over Kobe.
No Idea.
1. reinactment of ALEXANDER OVECHKIN
Now this is the ultimate fan video. We have what appears to be a girl in a hockey mask with a full shield trying to re-enact Alexander Ovechkins famous goal. Watch both videos and try and tell me which one is real, I dare ya! (The spelling of "reinactment" is the icing on the cake)
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Road Rage Incident
Today is the one week anniversary of my "situation" with another motorist while driving my perfectly manufactured German automobile (I drive a Golf; Good car).
Time: approximately 5:30 p.m.
Location: Bowmanville, Ontario
While on my way to work, another vehicle pulled out in front of me. Now, keep in mind that it was slightly busy at this time of day, and this driver may not have known exactly what he did. But that's really here nor there.
When someone pulls out in front of me, I would expect that he immediately hits the gas with force to make sure he now has ample room in front of me...This driver did not do this. Instead, he continued on in the way that a 90-year old grandmother would: Hovering arounf the 50 km/h mark while not only holding up myself, but the other 260 cars behind me.
Now from here, I am not far from the 401 West exit. But I guessed (correctly) soon after he pulled out in front of me where he was going.
You guessed it: West on the 401.
After making the slow turn onto the ramp, I noticed this driver looking around, enjoying the scenery as if he was the only driver on the road. I despise this.
At this point, I started tailgating and threw up my arms in dismay.
He responded as I hoped he would. He tapped his brakes and made his own gesture to let me know he saw me make mine. (Only now does he realize I'm behind him, it seems)
Next, I gain speed like one should, so that I am able to blend in with the flow of traffic. I pass the other motorist.
As I do, I flip him the bird. I've had it. He looks at me. I'm not sure what he does, except he thinks what I just did was amusing.
So now I'm passed this clown. But now he wants me to know that his Monte Carlo has some giddyup, and he speeds past me at a rate that I wasn't sure he was capable of doing just minutes earlier.
He laughs as he zooms by.
By now, I'm satisfied that I'm on my way and can do my regular speed of around 120 km/h.
The Monte Carlo is probably a kilometre away now, and presumably out of my life.
Except, I notice that I'm creeping closer and closer to this jackass.
I eventually pass him, and when I do, I look into my rear view mirror and notice that this guy is now rubbing his hands together and urging me to "come on" by waving his hands like you would if you were ever telling someone to "bring it on."
I laugh to myself and try to ignore the man who resembles some sort of biker who isn't used to four wheels.
Eventually, he realizes I'm not into any sort of games he has in mind, so he pulls past me again.
Only this time, he proceeds to mouth the word "pussy" and challenges my manhood by placing his thumb and index finger mere inches apart. Centimetres maybe. (I'm average)
Again, I laugh. I also flip him the bird again while mouthing my own set of words: "fuck you."
This retard is loving this moment in his life and I think to myself, "how pathetic, this is the highlight of his day, maybe even his year."
By now I'm wondering if he's going to follow me to work, and I cursed myself for not leaving my bat in the trunk at the conclusion of baseball season.
But he didnt follow me to work.
He got off in Pickering, thus ending one of the most entertaining drives to work that I'd ever encountered.
Loser!
Time: approximately 5:30 p.m.
Location: Bowmanville, Ontario
While on my way to work, another vehicle pulled out in front of me. Now, keep in mind that it was slightly busy at this time of day, and this driver may not have known exactly what he did. But that's really here nor there.
When someone pulls out in front of me, I would expect that he immediately hits the gas with force to make sure he now has ample room in front of me...This driver did not do this. Instead, he continued on in the way that a 90-year old grandmother would: Hovering arounf the 50 km/h mark while not only holding up myself, but the other 260 cars behind me.
Now from here, I am not far from the 401 West exit. But I guessed (correctly) soon after he pulled out in front of me where he was going.
You guessed it: West on the 401.
After making the slow turn onto the ramp, I noticed this driver looking around, enjoying the scenery as if he was the only driver on the road. I despise this.
At this point, I started tailgating and threw up my arms in dismay.
He responded as I hoped he would. He tapped his brakes and made his own gesture to let me know he saw me make mine. (Only now does he realize I'm behind him, it seems)
Next, I gain speed like one should, so that I am able to blend in with the flow of traffic. I pass the other motorist.
As I do, I flip him the bird. I've had it. He looks at me. I'm not sure what he does, except he thinks what I just did was amusing.
So now I'm passed this clown. But now he wants me to know that his Monte Carlo has some giddyup, and he speeds past me at a rate that I wasn't sure he was capable of doing just minutes earlier.
He laughs as he zooms by.
By now, I'm satisfied that I'm on my way and can do my regular speed of around 120 km/h.
The Monte Carlo is probably a kilometre away now, and presumably out of my life.
Except, I notice that I'm creeping closer and closer to this jackass.
I eventually pass him, and when I do, I look into my rear view mirror and notice that this guy is now rubbing his hands together and urging me to "come on" by waving his hands like you would if you were ever telling someone to "bring it on."
I laugh to myself and try to ignore the man who resembles some sort of biker who isn't used to four wheels.
Eventually, he realizes I'm not into any sort of games he has in mind, so he pulls past me again.
Only this time, he proceeds to mouth the word "pussy" and challenges my manhood by placing his thumb and index finger mere inches apart. Centimetres maybe. (I'm average)
Again, I laugh. I also flip him the bird again while mouthing my own set of words: "fuck you."
This retard is loving this moment in his life and I think to myself, "how pathetic, this is the highlight of his day, maybe even his year."
By now I'm wondering if he's going to follow me to work, and I cursed myself for not leaving my bat in the trunk at the conclusion of baseball season.
But he didnt follow me to work.
He got off in Pickering, thus ending one of the most entertaining drives to work that I'd ever encountered.
Loser!
Monday, April 6, 2009
Blue Jays Home Opener
Just a quick thought on the morons who throw things on the field while at the Blue Jays home opener's.
Just stay away from the goddamn ballpark. Please.
You are the reason I did not attend this year, and am instead writing this about.
You imbeciles will not go to another game all year, you are not real fans, and you do not know jack shit about baseball. So please just stay home.
Thank you.
Ps: Brian Tallet's mustache is fantastic, but it's still not as good as Eck's.
Just stay away from the goddamn ballpark. Please.
You are the reason I did not attend this year, and am instead writing this about.
You imbeciles will not go to another game all year, you are not real fans, and you do not know jack shit about baseball. So please just stay home.
Thank you.
Ps: Brian Tallet's mustache is fantastic, but it's still not as good as Eck's.
Seperated At Birth - Nabber Division
Don't Worry guys, I'm all over it.
Below you'll see Ed Helms (I was told that just once and didn't really like the comparison as I feel I'm much more attractive)
Also, former NHL Defenceman Cory Cross...
And Fake and Bake master/former Blue Jay Marty Cordova (He once missed a game after spending too much time in a tanning bed)
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Seperated at Birth
As you know, we here at 3 Dusters enjoy the lighter side of things. So enjoy these seperated at births for Tbo (Lance Berkman, Houston Astros) and myself (Cam Ward, Carolina Hurricanes) and please help us find a good sep at b for our friend Nabber, leave a comment if you have any idears.
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