So myself and some pals attended a Blue Jays game this weekend and decided it would be a great idea to get the All-You-Can-Eat tickets. I was somewhat skeptical on the availability of food and the frequency at which we would be able to crush hot dogs and nachos. For instance, would I be able to grab as much chow as I pleased at any time? Or would I be limited to grabbing 2 dogs and a pop per inning or something gay like that. I was not disappointed. It was one of the best decisions I've made in my life. Goody already touched on his gluttony...and may I say that is a very impressive amount of nacho dishes. Let's just say I ate as many dogs as there are innings in a baseball game, and we combined to lay waste to somewhere in the realm of 25-30 chiens as a group. Too good.
As a result, I've been inspired to share with you what I believe to be the 5 most outstanding foods that are also guaranteed to be in the top 5 list of foods that most certainly will increase the risk of heart disease. I'm going to limit this to foods that I have actually consumed...I've heard of burgers that have a fuckin Krispy Kreme donut serving as the bun, and although that is surely the fattest and most fantastic thing I've ever heard of, unfortunately I have not experienced it. Here we goooo...
#5: Taquitos from 7 Eleven - To be honest, I don't even know what the hell these things are made of, but they are so tastyyy. If you have never had one of these you are missing out. Such a treat.
#4: Big Mac - So classic. The fact that there is such a thing as a Double Big Mac is really just a slap in the face to me. Just make me fatter, thanks a lot. If I love Big Macs, why would I NOT get a Double Big Mac? Fuck you Ronald.
#3: McGriddles - These are just so retarded. Bacon or sausage with egg and cheese inside what can best be described as 2 mini pancakes. They are about the size of your fist and you might as well not eat for the rest of the day if you have one. I'll have 2 please.
#2: Stuffed Crust Pizza from Pizza Hut - I could have just said pizza and left it at that, but this za is just so extra good and fat. Just when you thought there was no more room for more cheese on the wheel, they toss it in the crust. Bonus.
#1: Poutine from pretty much anywhere - I'm placing this at number 1 right now but this list is really completely interchangeable from day to day. I loves me some poutine though. Shout out to my buddy Orty up in Ottawa for introducing me to the Elgin Street Diner's poutine. They top off your fries, gravy and cheese with chopped up meat. Stupid good.
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